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I think I’ve been fluctuating lately between having an extreme emotional investment in these past-life memories and having almost no investment at all.

When I have an emotional investment in them, I become extraordinarily patient and thoughtful about just about everything, and I’m fairly quiet, passive, and easy to talk to.  But the down side is I tend to get really angsty too, especially with the whole question of why I always get weird problems and unhappy memories of a past life is just another cherry on top of that bizarre little sundae.

Other times, when I’m not so emotionally vested, I find that I’m a bit irritable and insensitive, maybe even prone to wanting to join some cause and seething with hatred for certain ideas, and certain words or phrases or an insensitive tone of voice is enough to make me hate someone’s guts.  And it bothers me to be like that because even when I’m not emotionally vested, I understand on an intellectual level that I should know better than to think that way.

I just want to find some middle ground where I can integrate what I’ve experienced without snapping to one extreme or the other.  I want to find peace without becoming gloomy.


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