New Thoughts

The most recent past life I suspect is unique in that I can actually speak to living people who knew this person.  That means unlike John or William (or that fox), I can confirm or disprove these small personal memories.  Right now, the letter I sent is on its way down the coast, due to arrive at its destination by tomorrow.

But suppose I’m completely wrong with these memories, or right on some details but wrong on others with only about a 50-60% accuracy rate.  That will not only mean that I can never claim my most recent past life with any confidence, but that all the other lives I have recalled- every joy and sorrow- may have just been a shadow play I made for myself.

This is not a thought I haven’t had before.  I often suspect that it is either delusions or elaborate fantasies of some sort.  Still, admittedly, I have become very emotionally attached to their stories, particularly John’s life.

If I discover that I’ve been entirely wrong, as I strongly suspect, I still intend to try to get John’s headstone fixed.  It’s the least I could do after I learned what he went through.  I will still record these flashes of apparent memory when they happen, and I will still investigate them through research.  I will still use what I have seen and felt in my writing and hopefully produce the best work of my entire life.  I will still post off-topic musings about life, death, the universe, and my perspective which will never be the same after what I have experienced.

I also intend to travel to the Bay Area next year and to France, Belgium, and England in 2015 to see these places on the ground, regardless of whether or not I was there in another life.  I want to see for myself how well or how poorly I understood these places.

Whatever happens, I don’t think positive proof or disproof is possible, but it is well with me whether it’s true or not.  I’m a very different person than I was a year ago, stronger, wiser, more compassionate, more curious, and more creative than ever.  No one can take that from me.


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