Sleep Troubles

For a while leading up to my first memories of a possible past life in WWI, I was having sleep troubles.  I would wake up screaming, or I would have dreams of someone standing over my bed or outside my window watching me sleep and would wake up confronting them about it or threatening to kill them, much to the dismay of my fiance.  Now and then I would be half-awake and start lashing out and hitting him thinking it was a stranger in my bed.

These episodes took other forms too, various sleep disturbances, but they all had one thing in common: they never had anything to do with the war.  

They became less common after the memories but have come sporadically.  However, the last week or so has had them becoming more frequent.  This also coincides with the first truly disturbing memory I’ve had in a while (which I ended up feeling emotionally blocked from soon after, as if my body or mind wouldn’t allow me to cry or to feel any more).

I’ve been discussing the sleep disturbances with my doctor; I’m not just assuming its past life anxiety and leaving it at that because 29 is just a bit old to be having night terrors.  In the mean time, I’m fully expecting to have severe flashbacks any day now, on the magnitude of the moment I realized that this life isn’t the first I’ve ever lived.

Keep in mind I’ve discovered several other lives since then, and I just know I’ve blocked out violent memories from several of them.  I have no recollection of any battles in medieval times, though I was quite familiar with war in those days; I have no recollection of some of the more frightening episodes from Phil’s life either, though he certainly had his share of unpleasant dealings with sketchy people that make my troubles with roommates and the like seem tame.  And as for “Jackson” and “Clive,” I know one may have been involved in the American Revolution and the other may have been involved in the political upheavals in England in the 1840s.  Then there’s that huge gap between 1226 and 1750 that I have no memories of; how many times was I shot, drowned, beheaded, hanged, or crushed in that span of time?

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