Last night, I had some memories that suggest that I may not have been a fox in Japan after all.
The memories were in Japan, but they challenge the idea of having been a wild animal. Most notably, I remembered things in color (I have memories from another time that were in blues and yellows that were more convincing).
Second, there was a care-worn old woman (my grandmother perhaps?) bathing me, rubbing something in my hair and saying “Yosh, yosh, yosh,” (in this case, roughly “there there”). I had brief flickers of toys or children’s books or something brightly colored.
But there was also the memory of the back door of the temple, where I remember being among foxes. Was I a foundling? Was I a child, then a fox or vice versa? Or was I a pet fox, kept by an eccentric old woman and treated like a child (the way so many ennobled pets become convinced that they’re people)?
Whatever the case, if I was a human child I must have died at a very young age some time in the 1920s, which is sad to think about. It’s curious to think how different the story plays out if I wasn’t a fox; a generous lifetime for a small, wild animal is a tragically short life for a human being.
But which was I? I’m really at a loss.