The Eyes Have It

I have never posted a photo of myself here.  In part, it’s because I don’t want to give away my identity (though it isn’t exactly a closely-guarded secret).  However, a while back I found a photo of myself that to me showed something very revealing.

I decided to place it side by side with a photo of Philip K. Dick, but even though it’s a pre-transition photo I might still prove recognizable so I cropped it so that just the eyes are showing.

Here it is:

theeyeshaveit

The photo on the left is Phil in 1974, shortly after his experience with Valis (at least to the best I can determine that’s about when the photo was taken).  The photo on the right is me, in the spring of 2004, sitting in the Blowing Stone pub in Wantage, Oxfordshire during a trip in which I also spent a substantial amount of my day in Wiltshire (countryside Longespee would have known well).

Without showing the whole face it’s hard for me to prove, but to me it looked like the exact same expression: pale, blank, and haunted, a thousand-yard stare that looks right through the viewer.

There are some obvious soft tissue differences in the folds above Phil’s eyes and the effects of aging (I was only 19 in the 2004 photo), but what I found strange when I measured the face was that everything from the bridge of the nose up is more or less the exact same proportions.  This also shows my eye color.  I was unable to find a good photo showing Phil’s eye color but according to records his eyes are variously described as “blue” and “blue-green.”  My hair is also brown like his but with less of a red highlight.

The comparison proves nothing, but it’s interesting nonetheless.

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