I Hate This

I hate dreading what was once a fun and festive holiday for me.

I miss the days when the sound of a firecracker going off nearby didn’t set me all jumpy and irritable for the rest of the day (sometimes days on end).

I miss not having these memories.  I chose a hell of a time to stop avoiding them.

I hear loud ones going off outside right now as I’m writing this.  It’s all still there.  Damn it all.  It’s all still there.

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